Why Some Children Improve Faster Than Others

Our boy Josh

One of the questions I hear most from parents is:

"Why doesn't my child seem to be improving as quickly as everyone else?"

The first thing I'd say is this:

Improvement isn't linear.

Children don't usually get a little bit better every week. Sometimes they'll seem to stand still for months before suddenly making a huge leap forward. As coaches, we see it all the time.

One player we coach went through a difficult spell that happened to coincide with a growth spurt. We kept putting the hard yards into his technique and ball mastery, but for a while it felt like nothing was changing. Then, almost overnight, everything clicked. His growing pains settled down, his body caught up with itself, and suddenly his strength, power and technical ability all jumped forward.

It wasn't that the coaching had suddenly started working. His brain simply needed time to calibrate to the changes in his body.

That's why patience is so important.

As coaches, we're not just looking at goals or assists when we judge whether a child is improving. One of the biggest signs of development is awareness.

If a player no longer has to stare at the ball every time they receive it and can start seeing what's happening around them, that's huge progress. It tells us they're becoming more comfortable technically, giving themselves the confidence to make better decisions. Those improvements often happen long before they become obvious on a matchday.

Physical development also plays a much bigger role than many people realise.

Take two five-year-olds in the same age group. One is born in September, the other in August. The September-born child could have almost an extra year of development behind them. At five years old, that's a fifth of their entire life. It's a significant advantage physically, emotionally and cognitively.

It's something I've even thought about with my own son. He was born in late August, and we'll have to carefully consider when he starts school because those early developmental differences can have long-term effects, not just academically but in competitive sport too.

Parents naturally compare their child with others, and to some extent that's understandable. Teams have to be selected and coaches need to know where players sit within a squad.

The danger is when comparison becomes the only measure of progress.

A better question is:

"Is my child becoming a better footballer than they were six months ago?"

That's a much healthier way of judging development.

One player who reminds me of this is Josh. We've coached him for eight years now, (which makes me feel very, very old).

When we first met him at nine years old, I'd never have predicted he'd become a scholar at Bristol City. He was talented, but the jump from where he was then to where he is now has been enormous.

What stands out to me is that he wasn't desperately chasing success. His parents weren't obsessing over milestones and performances.

He listened. He worked incredibly hard. He stayed calm. As he moved through his early teens, he began to understand himself better as a player, and with that came confidence. Today, he's given himself a genuine opportunity to become a professional footballer.

His story is a reminder that predicting a child's future at nine or ten years old is almost impossible.

Development doesn't follow a timetable.

Some children sprint ahead early. Others quietly build the foundations before taking a huge step forward later on.

As coaches and parents, our job isn't to rush that process.

It's to make sure that when those opportunities for growth come, children are ready to take them.